is a phrase I most recently heard whilst watching a long-ago episode of 'The Good Life', the one where Margo has a windbreak incident and tortures a workman with her wonderfully acerbic phrases. It's an episode of carefully executed misunderstandings and over-reactions. One of my favourite.
I have been in 'high dudgeon' for a while about all sorts of things. I was beginning to wonder whether I had some kind of random anxiety disorder. It has become a bit of a habit. Even when there isn't a problem or an issue or a niggle, given the right conditions, I have been able to create a mountain where not even a molehill has been and I have tested the patience and understanding of some of the people closest to me. Yes, you know who you are and thank you!
I have my theories why this is happening. I think, most probably, that a difficult anniversary is approaching and instead of grieving and acknowledging actual facts and reality, I'm doing a very good job of creating all sorts of semi-traumatic worries and anxieties thereby distracting myself from what I really need to do which is grieve and move on somehow. I hope over the next few weeks to be able to do this. I don't think it's going to be particularly easy but it's going to have to happen.
Today, unexpectedly, has been a day of resolution. Someone astrological could probably explain this and, in fact, my stars on Sunday said that I'm going to have a fantastic month but to be wary of 'odd dreams'. Perhaps my random anxieties can be called 'odd dreams'. If I could sleep through the night I am sure I would have some.
To end on a more positive note....I am just off to play 'mastermind' with E who has now recovered from her sickliness and waiting patiently for me to come up with some suitable questions about fish.