Every year I make them and every year I break them, so, now I'm forty I'm giving up giving up. It's pointless. Worse than that, promising to deny myself in all sorts of ways just makes me feel bad and inspires bouts of senseless eating to make myself feel better. Maturity is a great thing, don't you think?
We were sitting with friends yesterday discussing getting older. The gentleman in the party were very sensible about the whole thing, deciding that worrying about getting older is a silly thing to do and we should all just get on with it.
I came to the conclusion that there are advantages of getting a little older. Firstly, see the above paragraph. You can simply refuse to do stuff you don't want to. Secondly, and I see this as a great advantage, the older you get, the easier it is to behave badly because expectations of you are higher and much more specific. Therefore you can get the same feelings of thrilldom that were experienced in headier more youthful times by doing things like not cleaning your windows or giving people non-bone-china cups when they come for tea or, heavens, serving instant coffee in a mug! Believe me, this works. A slight subversion of daily social requirements can be quite exhilarating especially for viewers of Cranford and other BBC (NOT ITV) period dramas.
Christmas is over so I want to take the tree down. I am meeting some resistance to this plan from G and the beloved offspring. If I was in charge, the tree would be removed today, New Year's Eve to at least give the impression of clear, clutter free minimalism. However, as I am not in charge, merely the staff, I must resign myself to a few more days of sparkly trinkets and wonkily displayed Christmas cards.
To counteract this lack of control, I am going to do some gardening instead. I don't think I've gone further than the edge of the patio for a couple of months. I look at the dreary, weeded square from the kitchen and just can't bear to tackle it. I went through a phase of loving gardening, watching Monty Don, dreaming of herbaceous borders but I just see it all as potential compost now. I can't think what changed. I shall ponder.